lately my life feels like its been a drag. I don’t know why either. I’m having a great time at school; I love it here. The past two weekends have been really fun, school is going well… most classes at least. I guess you can say I’ve felt somewhat lonely around here. My roommate Johnny goes home every weekend… and now that cheetos (my other roommate) has a broken leg he ends up going home every weekend as well. And pete is still in DC co-opping. But whats sad, we all do our own thing when we are all here. Rachel (cheet’s girlfriend) is here with cheet for the first half of the week and then leaves to go home… and that’s pretty much the other reason matt goes home is to be with her. Then Johnny goes home every weekend just because he does for some reason… always has. During the week he spends his time talking on the phone with his girlfriend. So it feels like I have my own place, which is nice at times… but I wish I had someone around all the time that I could hangout with on a daily basis. Now that I think of it… andy, a friend that is in the same major as me, is kind of in the same boat… we really should start doing stuff together. We both live here at irving commons. And he has one roommate that’s never around as well. The weekends are another story though… usually tom or brice picks me up Friday and I end up hanging out with that crew all weekend, which is great… love hanging out with that whole group. And even that has a problem in itself: a place to stay at night. Every weekend I end up sleeping on couches and for the most part its great that I have so many places to stay, but my bed would be nice sometimes.

I don’t really know what is going on in my life right now… I mean I don’t feel like there is a spot for ‘me’ in this world, if that makes sense. I don’t have friends or a significant other to spend everyday with. My best friends from home I never see or talk to. It’s kinda sad. I donno… next semester will be different with pete around I think… and then next year WILL be awesome because I will be on campus again, and hopefully living in a house with all my friends. I’m not saying that this year isn’t sweet already… my awesome friends always are cool as hell about picking me up and its ‘the best time in my life’ hanging out with them. I’m blessed to have such great friends. I guess I just feel far, disconnected, and lonely at times and really don’t know how to feel about it.

The title is lyrics from the band; terminal. Really awesome group… totally sets my mood in general lately. To leave on a positive note… here are some lyrics from terminal that really expresses my weekends. Haha…

lets stay out all night
go everywhere we took
live while we're alive
and take the world for more
for more

when the sun is coming up
and we're still hanging out
it's never been so nice to have someone around
who believes in love

couldn't we all use the company
when days don't last
couldn't we stand to hear someone say
we're not all bad

lets not make it home tonight
because days don't last

im going to bed now. goodnight.

The art Chicago trip was pretty sweet. I got to hangout with all the awesome art students and meet a couple new ones as well. We saw a lot of cool art… definitely worth seeing but I’m pretty much art’ed out for a while. Both nights I spent over my sister’s boyfriend’s apartment, just chilling out with a few brewskis, talking, and watching football. My sister is at home taking classes at Case Western for her Graduate Degree. I am really happy for both of them… really the perfect couple. Plus, Kyle is quite a badass older brother. He even takes care of me. :)

This week has been close to being in hell catching up on all my work, but fun nonetheless. Last night Tom, Brice, and I went to the waffle house (rofl-house) at 3 in the morning. It was quite an interesting adventure, as all things are with Thomas J. They screwed up our orders… my waffle, hash browns, and hot chocolate was $2.79. Too bad I slept through my marketing class this morning. =/ Oh well, it was worth it.

Cheetos, my roommate, is back from resting at home and is hopping around everywhere on his one good leg. I don’t think I have seen him use his crutches yet. Haha, what a character. He co-oping again, so things are much more lively around here. The girls from 311/309 college park came up to give him a care package, and there were some cookies and stuff… we were out of milk so I just got back from getting some at UDF for the gimp.

Some bad news I received this weekend; my friend, Kim, lost her father from a heart attack. The funeral is on Friday, I wish I could go but it’s just too hard to make it up to St. Louis with all the stuff that’s going on. I wish Kim and her family the strength to get through this tough time. I also hold my prayers for them in my heart. I understand how hard it is… my dad lost his father when he was 17 years old. This just reminds us all how precious life is… don’t take a second for granted.

This week had been extremely busy, but it is going fast. I’m glad tomorrow is Thursday. I’m looking forward to this weekend; like most people. My title for this post is from the new death cab for cutie album; plans… the song ‘soul meets body.’ Great song, and album; relaxing and lyrically moving. When music gets me thinking about my own life… it is automatically good in my book. And this song gets me thinking.

Lets see… nothing all that new is going on in my life... schooling and such. This three-day weekend was a nice break. I should be doing homework and doing something productive, but I felt that I needed to spill some of my thoughts. For how lame this sounds, I think this blog is a very positive thing. I reflect on my life and when I do this I can see my life from almost outside and not take things for granted. I think that is positive.

Next weekend I’m going to Chicago for the art trip. I went last year and it was pretty awesome, but for some reason I feel ‘not accepted’ when I’m with the whole art crowd. There are a few people that are going on the trip that I feel really comfortable around and I really like being with them… but for some reason I feel like an outsider with the rest of them. I hate how I do this to myself… I think I just make it worse because I make myself feel this way when I shouldn’t. Oh well, I shouldn’t worry; it will be a good time.

My title is a classic from mae. I love them so much… I haven’t listened to them in awhile and it just sounds so good right now. They are definitely one of my all time favorites.